What’s worse? A teenager or a three-nager?

Hmm this is a tough one huh?! Let’s see, a three-nager has temper tantrums, but guess what? So do teenagers! When they don’t get their own way usually. 



Do we give in? 

Do we give the three year old the lollipop that she desperately wants? 

Do we give the thirteen year old the phone that she desperately wants? 

It certainly gets expensive having teens!!! Keeping up with all the electronic devices, as well as the brand name sports clothing she now wants. No more cute $5 T-shirts from K-mart for your teenager. 

With a three year old you can do a bit of bribing…you can do this, if you do that. 

But guess what? We can actually do that with teens too. It’s just a lot harder. And with both age groups we need to have rules & boundaries. The rules you set for your toddler is going to shape their behaviour as a child, tween, and teen. If she always gets her way when she’s little, she’s certainly going to demand she gets her own way as a teen. 

It’s up to us as the parent to stick to our boundaries, but it’s a very delicate line, in also being too rigid and too authoritarian, which doesn’t turn out well either. 

Teens don’t like rules because they are growing in independence and want to assert that independence. But the purpose of a parent is to show some guidance. 

Toddlers don’t like rules either. You can’t reason with a toddler or a teenager. She will not see your point of view. Both age groups still need a concise clear explanation of why something is not appropriate. 

Teens dig their heels in about their opinion. It means so much to them. 

But have you ever seen a toddler go stiff in a car seat? 

Or a toddler going limp when you are trying to walk them somewhere? 

Not a pretty sight. 

Lots of shopping centre expeditions turn into a nightmare with a three year old. The great thing about a teen is you can drop her at the shopping centre and run, and not be a bad parent!!! 

How hard is it to say no to your teen daughter when she wants to do something you don’t feel comfortable with? How much pressure does she put on you, telling you that all the other girls are allowed? It’s certainly hard to say no to a three year old when they look at you with those big cute puppy eyes. But if we give in to everything they want to do, is that going to turn out well in the long run? Certainly saying no all the time breeds resentment. There’s a happy medium, but tricky to find it. 

How fussy is your daughter’s eating? 

Three year olds can spend hours at the table, refusing to eat their greens. 

Teens can’t even remember what the colour green is! Except if they’ve left their lunchbox in their school bag on the school holidays. Yes, my teen daughter has done this. 

What about at Xmas? Three year olds get so excited and Mums keep the magic alive with talk of Santa and toys and photos and carols and the magic of the whole Christmas season. 

Teens barely raise a smile, and it’s almost impossible to get a Santa photo. 

Where can you bring magic into a teen’s Xmas? Probably just buying the electronic device they are dying to try. 

Some Xmas traditions and family routines are still important. And it takes a bit of creativity to think how to engage a teen in the house, around the dining table, or on the holiday break. 

As a past kindy teacher and a Mum of 3 teens, I’ve seen the best, and worst of both worlds. Kindy kids talk your ear off and ask a million questions, their beautiful curiosity is never satisfied. Teens are often silent, headphones in: sometimes you get a grunt or a nod. 

Who’s got more sass?

Well, the jury is out…which is worse? A teenager or a three-nager? 

I vote the teenager is worse! 🤣🤣🤣

What’s your opinion???

Lots of love 

Julie 💞💞💞💞💞💞